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God Save The Queen (A Seat)

We simply had to share this brilliant invite to an Eels gig from frontman E to – of all people – the Queen. It’s genius politeness of the sort that we haven’t had in rock’n’roll since the Stones invented the badboy image of being in a band.

"Your Majesty, My name is Mark Oliver Everett. My friends call me 'E'. I am the singer in an American rock band called Eels. We will be playing a show at your Royal Festival Hall on the evening of February 25th and I would like to extend an invitation for you to attend our performance. We have played the Festival Hall several times and I've noticed that your royal box is usually empty. I'd like to change that. We have also played your Queen Elizabeth and Royal Albert Halls. I don't think you were at those shows either.

"I recently saw the movie 'The Queen' and while I know that wasn't actually you in the film, it made me think that I would like you as a person. I'd like you to be one of the people who call me 'E'. If you're free February 25th, please come down to the show. It's sold out, but I would be happy to put you on the guest list. I also have a new book, 'Things The Grandchildren Should Know', and two new compact disc and DVD collections, 'Meet The Eels' and 'Useless Trinkets'. I think you'd enjoy them and I'd be happy to give you complimentary copies of each, which I will even sign for you after the show. If you're busy, I understand. But if you can free up your calendar, we'd love to see you there. Thank you for your time, Your Majesty".

Anonymous Vs. Scientology

O.K., so now almost everyone knows what's behind those Dianetics leaflets they foist on you outside Churchill Square, but who knows who's behind these? This is the kind of thing that happens to remind me that the human race isn't always a disappointingly dependable disaster area. Go on and smile all your way through:

http://deathboy.livejournal.com/1082404.html

MxBx

NFR January Download

This is what we’ve been scouting round and found this month to bring to you in the full glory of Not For Resale’s January mix.

Download here: http://www.sendspace.com/file/cge8z4

To hear:

Fenech-Soler – The Fight (Demo)
Cobra Dukes – Life Of The Party (Airtight Single, Prestel)
Dirty Fingernails – Bruno (Demo)
XBX – 1,2,3,4 (Demo)
Tayside Mental Health – Diary Of A Donkey Fucker (Evil Hands Are Happy Hands, Contaminated Recordings)
Charlottefield – Pacifically (What Are Friends For, FatCat)
Reverence For Benjamin – Grey Sky Winter (Demo)
Cottonmouth Rocks – Cellar Door (Demo)
Comradedown – Alone (What Is For Me Won’t Go By Me EP, Self-Released)
Kill Krinkle Club – Ballrooms Waiting For Us (The Bloody Murder of Krinkle, Self-Released)
Deep Hole – Touch The Earth (Demo)
Sky:Lark – These Kids Have Weapons (Demo)
Epideme – Ex-Crown (Demo)
Sloath – Black Hole (Demo)
Kontakte – Ghosts Of Electricity (Demo)
Lonely Ghosts – Happy Lovers – Friends Forever (Demo)
Plastic Passion – Look Around (Demo)
Mr Jack Cooper – Don’t Give Up The Day Job (Live at Engine Room, Brighton)
Action Beat – Justice Yeldman (Demo)



WOO HOO!!!

Enjoy,

MxBx

NFR December Download

>>> DOWNLOAD HERE <<<

21 tracks, 72 minutes of demo mayhem it contains all these tunes by all these terribly fine soon to be popular beat combos:

Failure Mode – Twin Box Failure (Demo)
Working For A Nuclear Free City– Troubled Son (Working For A Nuclear Free City, Melodic)
Everyone To The Anderson – When Beasts Attack! (Doodlebug Ep, Toy Soldier Records)
Diagonal– Cannon Misfire (Demo)
Koala Part– You're Right There (Demo)
Voice Of The Seven Woods– The Fire In My Head (Voice Of The Seven Woods, Twisted Nerve)
Zettasaur– Grip Of A Caveman (Split 7", Signature Tune)
The Flesh Happening– Bleed (Single, Tamworth Records)
Hotel Wrecking City Traders – The Porch (Demo)
Blood Red Shoes– It's Getting Boring By The Sea (Blamma Blamma Remix) (Single, V2)
Transformer– Cinema Car (Long Version) (Demo)
Lonely Ghosts – Predictions (Split 7", One Inch Badge Records)
The Middle Computer– Fiction (Ultra Console Mayhem, Non-Applicable Records)
Pseudo Nippon - Fishlady (Demo)
The Hornblower Brothers – Android With A Heart (Demo)
The Melody, The Melodica And Me – Track One (Demo)
-A+M– End Up Like Superman (Dials, Lancashire & Somerset Song And Dance Society)
Woog Riots – Martial Arts (Demo)
Deliberate- XEXTXIX (Demo)
Wrath Of The Weak – Journey Of Many Days (Wrath Of The Weak, Bastardised)
Autumn Chorus - Remember The Dead (Demo)


Enjoy.


MxBx

Top 50 Albums of 2007

Yup. So my top 50 list begins today over on my MySpazz blog.

usually when people say 'It's been a great year' I never really knew what they meant because they tend to all be the same. Well, this year has been a great year.

MxBx

News just in

Not For Resale has moved home.

No longer at Fitzherberts, it will be starting a new life at The Penthouse (above the Freebutt) on the 27th November.

There will be a massive big party type thing with guest DJ's Old Mayor and The Dirty Socials spinning us some of their favourite party starting tunes, plus yer usual residents (Me)atbreak and Fokka Wolfe.

We'll also be giving away some special ultra limited handmade t-shirts and hand numbered NFR mixes to the first lucky few who want them.

Owen Old Mayor made us this beautiful poster to announce the occasion:



See you all there, yeh?

MxBx

"Hello We're Turbowolf, We're A Hell And Roll Band From Inside A Calculator Made Out Of Molten Meat And Old Flesh From...Rats"

"We don't want to pass by unnoticed"

No chance of that:

This video was put together by the fantastic Don't Panic crew, its a round up of what went on at the Mucha Marcha / Don't Panic show the Woof played at 93ft East a few weeks back. The music all over the first part is a preview of their new track 'Bite Me Like A Dog'.




Out of all those bands, tell me which one is the keeper.


MxBx

Like a Bearhead in the morning

This is the sound of one man outsider band Bearhead’s first release; working subcutaneously, entrancing every cell like an organic magnetic pulse forcing blood through your body. Immediately it plunges you into a well of shimmering radiance; layers of vibration and fuzz entwining around each other, dense cables of matted hum sinking downwards under lightning rays that break through the surface, plunging into the steady rocking turbulence.

“Yeah, they’re like ‘Why would somebody make music like that?’ Well, I’m just trying to find something that’s beautiful for me you know? I feel alienated by most types of music and most people and I’m just striving to make something that I consider beautiful where most people consider it ugly and dark, which it is” says Oliver Hill, the enigmatic, softly spoken, incredibly prolific man behind Bearhead when I meet with him to talk about his work. It’s one of the first things he says.

In his room, I am surrounded by the materials that inhabit this man’s subconscious. Several guitars stand against walls or out in mid use, various amplifiers and speakers in different states of repair flank the walls and mysterious, heavily used effects pedals litter the floor. Dominating one wall is a huge painting with ragged slashes and arced somber brushstrokes that appears to flow from the same source as his music. “Yeah, exactly, yeah I’m glad you could see that.” He says when I comment on the similarities “I feel like they’re pretty much the same thing. Doing one or doing the other is not really that different. It’s like, as you say, coming from the same place, or making the same kind of marks, or resonances or shapes which need to be projected outwards.”

It is this approach to music, the combination of visual and sonic elements that is his signature. All his projects are imbued with a visual element as does much of noise; lending itself to psychedelic descriptors more readily than conventional music. When I mention the narrative element in noise music, Oliver says “The thing I love about abstract kinds of music and experimental kinds of music is it really allows the listener to use their imagination as they go along with it. It’s completely unpatronising at times because there is no story being forced down peoples’ throats, they can take themselves on a journey in their mind and fly between the peaks and troughs and…” He closes his eyes and waves his hands before clutching his head to conclude “...Just ride on different frequencies. If somebody can allow themselves to be under their imagination, it’s more rewarding than listening to pop songs or rock songs or anything meant to make people feel a particular thing”

Bearhead grew out of his previous incarnation as Falling Boy which he moved away from because “for a long time it was all about sawing, really bowed guitars and bowed with saws” and he does mean a saw, the rusty blade is visible behind a pile of clothes in the corner; “it was very gliding music.” He pauses while he considers; “I was just shifting away from that, not entirely, I haven’t completely done away with that project, but Bearhead’s more kind of bludgeoning.” His group project Terminal Outputs, who have supported bands like Electrelane and Birchville Cat Motel, includes Dallas who also performs as the fierce Green Mist (“I met him 3 days after he got to Brighton. He’s a Canadian. We started making music immediately”) and occasional drummer James Edmonds who Oliver says plays “amazing freeform kind of jazz drumming that’s at the same time kind of clattering, but really moving, surging, always really in tune with how we play.” He is part of expired duo Aries “with Danya who does really amazing hip-hop kind of drumming.” Together they made a 3 CD epic narcotic haze of a concept called The Bear Trilogy which over the course of 3 hours built from lugubrious whispers towards a seismic climax; Aries, says Oliver “finished in a big cloud of smoke.” He has recently begun releasing tapes on his Constant Vertigo label; “I’ve had a few tapes out on the website; one from Adam Lygo’s project Invisible, I’ve released my Bearhead project and Dreamer as well. I was really pleased with the quality of music that people were giving to me, especially the Dreamer tape; it’s an amazing journey through really low frequency guitar that’s really beautiful. I think I’ve sold all of the run that I did already.” He printed only thirty copies of each, but is very enthusiastic drawing himself up, becoming more animated as he says “I’ve been thinking about reissuing the tapes on CD because obviously some people don’t have tape players and it’s such amazing music that I really want to share it with people.” The releases on his label are hypnotically compelling; the Dreamer album is two 14 minute tracks, the first a sub bass Burzum blow-out, endlessly riffing into oblivion.

The Burzum reference is one which is met with ample approval and I wonder what he thinks it is that seems to be drawing noise and black metal closer together at the moment; “Black metal’s quite alienated music isn’t it? A lot of noise; it’s music that’s born from feeling alienated from society, from the way I see it at least, even in finding ways of expressing that. There’s very clearly an overlap. I mean Prurient is about as black metal as you can get without using guitars, I mean, he’s the full thing; black hair, leather gloves, screaming, you know, absolutely…” he pauses and wrings his hands as he searches for the right phrase to use “…wretched dark lyrics.” “I really like painting to Beholding the Daughters of the Firmament.” He says suddenly, referring to a track off Burzum’s Filosofem album. “Just the other day I had three friends over and we did those paintings…” he gestures to three small pictures on the wall, heavily coloured segmented block patterns of rough texture. “We did them in about 2 minutes flat. It’s quite precious having fucked up friends.” Oliver’s friends include Wolf Eyes and some would say you can’t get much more fucked up than that. “I’m going to release some Failing Lights which was Mike Connelly’s project, from Wolf Eyes and Hair Police. I always hang out with them every time they’re in the UK, so I’m really looking forward to all that he’s going to put onto tape.”

I ask him about traveling around playing, as it seems to be such an integral part of the noise scene. He says that “It’s good to travel. It’s great to go and play this kind of stuff to people and see the different kinds of reactions and see how people from different towns react to you. Chicago was the biggest gig I’ve ever played, it was a solo show. I played to 400 people at the Empty Bottle, which is a really good gig venue. It’s really good to play to so many people. I was playing through such a powerful PA as well and we’d activated the subs under the stage, so when I was playing I could feel my knees being shifted towards the crowd by the low frequencies. I played one chord, let one chord ring out for 15 minutes to start the show off and it was just thundering and all these people were just like…” he opens his eyes wide, cowering slightly “…it was just so incredible, just infinite sustain, really amazing.”

One criticism that many people level at the noise scene is it’s reliance on effects trickery, pedals and machines to make the sounds, with people skeptical that great art can be made from just manipulating noise, that there is no musical quality or skill to it. Oliver says that “I think it can be like that, there’s quite a lot of people in the scene who just buy a load of pedals because it’s quite easy to do, because they can’t be in a rock band and just jump on the bandwagon.” He raises his eyes to fix me with a look of steely conviction; “They’re not people who are driven to do it.”


Falling Boy / Bearhead
Constant Vertigo
Terminal Outputs


Meatbreak

Is THIS Cool?!

It’s so wrong it’s right really. The NME Cool List is out and although it’s everything we hate – and we wouldn’t trust the mag to pick out a tie for us for a photocopying job at AMEX – we just lap it up. So the bloke from Gallows ‘won’ this year? Can’t say we’re too fussed either way but it was good to see Jamie Klaxons up there, and Lovefoxxx too. Foals’ Yannis makes a showing (we can’t imagine how pissed off he is about it), as does the lovely Joe Lean, the only Brighton related entries (both have been on our covers) meaning we might do our own version for the end of year mag.

Anyway, here’s the list, and our opinion on each. Enjoy.

1. Frank Carter of Gallows: are tattoos and shouting enough?
2. Jamie Reynolds of Klaxons (13): completely, effortlessly cool
3. Lovefoxxx of CSS (10): possibly the most fun girl in the whole world - wildly cool
4. Ryan Jarman of The Cribs: bog-standard indie bloke
5. Lethal Bizzle: grime fella finds coolness with new indie tribe, can't you hack it with the real MCs, mate?
6. Alex Turner of Arctic Monkeys (32): clever fella but not really cool, almost anti-cool really
7. Kate Nash: a bit mumsy to be cool, tries too hard
8. Amy Winehouse (50): do drugs make you cool?
9. Beth Ditto of The Gossip (1): no-nonsense but not that cool really, rolling around the floor on every gig is funny but in danger of becoming self-parody
10. Keith Richards (26): old school cool
11. MIA: a bit of a twat, self important, some good tunes
12. Thom Yorke of Radiohead (9): shows that being fucked up isn't actually melenchollic like being in a movie, but has got a quality woky eye
13. Drew McConnell of Babyshambles: no one in such a half-arsed band is cool, but he's busy with the Love Music Hate Racism revival
14. Prince: was cool once but turning against you fans isn’t cool, and he was shit when we saw him live with all his jazz-funk jams
15. Tom Clarke of The Enemy: ratfaced midget who's about as uncool as it gets
16. Noel Gallagher of Oasis: funny but not cool – fuck off grandad
17. Hayley Williams of Paramore: quite cute
18. Brandon’s Tache – Brandon Flowers, The Killers: cooler than he is by far
19. Matt Bellamy of Muse (27): Muse like ‘em or not – they aren’t cool at all
20. James Smith of Hadouken: the coolest bloke ever if you're 14 years old, a fool if over 25
21. Caleb Followill of Kings of Leon: gave up drugs and fucking for religeon, apparently
22. Matt Helders of Arctic Monkeys: couldn’t spot him in a line up
23. Eddie Argos of Art Brut: cool as hell, witty, silly, articulate, loads of ideas
24. Craig Finn of The Hold Steady: not a particually cool band but Meatbreak and Mrs Meatbreak love them and he said in an interview he's 56 years old - he's bloody cool for 5, if that's true
25. Morgan Yeah? of Does it Offend You, Yeah?: apparently very funny but we've never met him, so...
26. Simon Neil of Biffy Clyro (28): has a line from the Beach Boys' 'God Only Knows' tattooed on his chest - that's very cool
27. Simon Taylor of Klaxons: pretty cool, marrying Lovefoxx isn’t he?
28. Karen O of Yeah Yeah Yeahs (5): yeah, and always will be
29. Kele Okereke of Bloc Party: no, moody, self important cunt
30. Meg White of The White Stripes (24): a role model for kids with low level Downs
31. Tim Harrington of Les Savy Fav: bald with a massive beard, he looks like a real ale explorer and wears a babygrow on stage - very cool
32. Gerard Way of My Chemical Romance (8): goth fool, but has a sense of humour sometimes
33. Jamie T: pub entertainer, lose the band mate
34. Pete Doherty (28): smackhead, nuff said
35. Lou Hayter of New Young Pony Club: oh god, absolutely breathtakingly lovely and cool as ice
36. Ian Brown: yeah, 15 years ago maybe – a self parody now
37. Joe Lean of Joe Lean and the Jing Jang Jong: very much so, lovely bloke too, will be massive this time next year
38. Andy Burrows of Razorlight: no one in Razorlight can escape the Borrell touch, but Andy did play on Chris TT's album so all is not lost
39. Kyle Falconer of The View: no, The View are piss-weak
40. Nicky Wire of Manic Street Preachers: all mouth and skirts, an idiot basically
41. Josh Homme of Queens of the Stone Age: legend, a real man
42. Cole Alexander of Black Lips: lunatic who's stageshow involves piss, sick and nakedness of obviously very cool
43. Suki of Real Heat: never heard of her but she's wearing a cassette on a chain in the pic which looks try-hard to us
44. Brandon Flowers of The Killers (29): a bit of a twat, his band are too stadium but have two good songs though
45. Yannis Philippakis of Foals: fucking hero – feisty, intelligent and means it, man
46. Patrick Wolf: the indie Mika, a pastel-faced fool
47. Carlos D of Interpol: don’t care, the new album is weak
48. Santogold: r&b mate of MIA that we don’t know to be honest
49. Dev Hynes of Lightspeed Champion: bloke from average band goes solo - good outfit in the mag though
50. Spider Webb of The Horrors: the bloke looks like the Childcatcher for fuck's sake - scariest band we've seen at 5am when 'worse for wear'

Kendall

World changes forever tomorrow

New Biggest Selling US Solo Star Announced

Have a guess who the biggest selling American solo artist is. No, not Elvis. No. not Madonna, Dylan, Neil Young or even Jason Falkner. Apparently, with sales of 123 million units (now ahead of Elvis' 118.5 million record/CDs/tapes etc) it’s…

…Garth Brooks.

Now, I consider myself to know a reasonable amount about music (I’m getting a consistent 75% on the excellent new Guardian daily music quiz) but I couldn’t tell you a single song of his. No wonder British bands fail to break America – we have completely different music taste. The only album of Garth’s that bombed was the one where he had a goth haircut instead of a cowboy hat. There’s a chance that he could top The Beatles, who have clocked up 170 million sales and are currently the top selling band in the US. That Macca dyes his hair so obviously could be a problem - what if they mistake him for a goth and stop buying the records. Garth would be a shoe-in.

Not For Resale news

Not For Resale's November Download is up now:

http://www.sendspace.com/file/7vly85

With these songs:

Bon Iver – The Wolves (Act I And Act Ii) (For Emma, Forever Ago, Self-Released)
Medicine & Duty – Last Request For A Heretic (Clouds Burn Slowly, Foolproof Projects)
Musixux – No Chemistry (Demo)
Milk Jaggit – End Of Lake (Demo)
The Middle Computer – Electreau (Ultra Console Mayhem!, Non-Applicable Records)
The Cathode Ray Syndrome – Track One (Argh Ep Demo)
The Teenagers – Scarlet Johansen (7", Merok)
Lords Spiritual – Feel The Love (Demo)
Numbers – Kosmos Love (Now You Are This, Kill Rock Stars)
Duke Raoul – Flood Me With Kisses (Demo)
Jakobinarina – Do My Love (His Lyrics 7", Regal)
Hotpants Romance – Shake (It's A Heatwave, Big Print)
Gnaw Their Tongues – Nihilism; Tied Up And Burning (Spasming And Howling, Bowels Loosening And Bladders Emptying, Vomiting Helplessly, Self Released)
Die Zukunft – Noir (Demo)
Palm Springs – I Start Fires (I Start Fires 7", Random Acts of Vinyl)
Monsters Build Mean Robots – will I avenge or revenge? (Monsters Build Mean Robots, Nice Weather For Airstrikes)

Exciting.

NFR has also moved from Fitzherberts every other wednesday to the last Tuesday of every month at The Penthouse. Big Penthouse party launch for the new Not For Resale. Poster coming soon, but here's an advance of the details:

Not For Resale Relaunch!
NEW TIME: Tuesday 27th November
NEW VENUE: The Penthouse
Free entry
8pm – Midnight

Residents Meatbreak and Fokka Wolfe with Special Guest DJ's Old Mayor and The Dirty Socials!!!

PLUS: We'll be giving away speshul yoo-neek handmade NFR T-Shirts and CDs

Something to look forward to.

MxBx

RIP Stylus Magazine: 2002 - 2007

Sad news today as possibly the best online music magazine shuts up shop with no new posts as of the 31st October. As much as I like to think they are faking their own death and will reemerge the other side of the year meaner, tighter, sharper than ever I have a harrowing feeling that this really is the end.

The magazine? Stylus.

For those of you that don't know it, and those of you that do they have posted a Bluffers Guide To Stylus Magazine: 2002 - 2007

Being in a mild state of shock and a far inferior writer to errr..most? (haha) of the Stylus guys and gals I'll let you read about it all yourselves in their words. Seriously, some of the writing on this site has been as inspirational as anything I have ever read, coming from some of the most informed, passionate and measured music journalists around. I have no idea why Pitchfork is ever indulged more publicity than Stylus. One of the things most attractive about it is that there was never any ivory-tower attitude with it being one the very few sites with the balls to allow comments underneath all the reviews and features opening discourses in which writers were harried as much as they were congratulated. The range of music the site covered, the depth of features, occasional bouts of lunacy which affected it from time to time, the knowingly reader-baiting articles and both the authority the writing commanded and the antagonism it provoked were all second to none - an immense achievement.

Anyway, enough from me.

RIP Stylus. You will be sorely missed.


Meatbreak

Turning The Tables On Young Music

‘I hear that you and your band have sold your guitars and bought turntables.
I hear that you and your band have sold your turntables and bought guitars.’
LCD Soundsystem 'Losing my Edge'

In the ongoing battle between guitars and turntables, it would at first seem the bands are winning. The lack of musicians in my school is quite disappointing but those rarities who are in bands should consider this: what if that DJ Stigmatic (yes, you Zeek Braz) steals all the groupies that hang outside the music room, cause he can actually make them dance?

However (good) Indie bands do have the upper hand because not only are they live, with the interactivity of the perfomance, but have started incorporating that electronic, dancy feel to their music. Sitting behind some laptop with a ready-made playlist and some unnecessary headphones could earn one more credit than a slightly out of time cover of 'Valerie'. Which makes sense I suppose.

So what is cooler, the mysterious robots of Daft Punk, or the legendary riffs of the Arctic Monkeys? Picking up a guitar and finding that D chord to a mass of arms crossed audience seems far less productive than sticking on a bit of the Chemical Brothers resulting in a mass of bopping heads.

Your choice though.

Naomi Berrio-Allen (Longhill High School Future Music Reporter)

Ukuleles Or Just Giants With Acoustic Guitars?

We first saw them at the Big Chill in 2005, but a return to the Paramount Comedy Festival has reminded us how much fun the Ukulele Orchestra of Great Britain are. Check out the clever cloggery of their multi-layered performance below.


Ukulele Orchestra of Great Britain Live

Kendall

Suited And Booted

Anyone wondering whether pop music has lost its bite just needs to consider Take That’s sartorial journey from S&M to M&S (they are modelling the new range of suits for Marks & Spencer).

Still, all that leather was not – as Heat magazine might say – a good look.

No More Sulking In The Studio For The Pixies

I’m really not sure how I feel about this one. The Pixies are my favourite band and I’ve worn out their old records and now Black Francis has revealed that Kim Deal has nixed any chance of a new album.
"While I may have tried to convince her otherwise, maybe she's got a point,” the son of incestuous union told The Gothamist. “She doesn't need a new Pixies record, so maybe there doesn't need to be one."

Mmmm… On the one hand you could ruin the legacy but on the other the four members have never really fired the way they did as the Pixies. Kim came close with The Breeders’ ‘Pod’ but since then things have been patchy. Black Francis/Frank Black clearly needs it more than anyone else – his song writing abilities have taken a massive dive since the glory days of band. He’s got a new album, 'Bluefinger', out now but much more excitingly The Breeders are apparently working with Steve Albini again. ‘Pod Pt.2’ is almost as exciting as ‘Doolittle Pt.2’.

Oh yeah, ‘Bam Thwok’ – their only post-reformation song – was crap. Best leave it to the excellent gigs then.

I Don’t Want A Rock Star Boyfriend

Us muggles find ourselves stiff competition in the midst of musicianly marriages. The über-cool and attractive seem to want to stick with their own. Or maybe they just don’t get out enough.

Recent couples include, Lily Allen and Ed Simmons aka Ed Chemical. Lovefoxxx of CSS and Simon of the Klaxons, have announced their engagement (sorry, a bit of sick came up). Meanwhile Jamie Reynolds of the Klaxons and that keyboardist Lou Hayter from New Young Pony Club acheive golden new rave couple status.

But maybe we should consider ourselves lucky. Their inbreeding fashions have procured weird and wonderful creatures such as Peaches Geldolf and Jack Osbourne. Hurrah for the Hillbillies.

Naomi Berrio-Allen

Stock Markets Crash, Worldwide Riots, Moon Out Of Orbit...

Hot news from U2 manager Paul McGuiness: "We're great fans of the Spice Girls but rumours that Bono is to join them as a sixth member are sadly not true."

Thank fuck for that.

Kendall